868 words
Recently I helped behind the scenes at a powerful nine-day personal growth intensive program that I'd attended as a participant a year before. I'd not assisted at this program before, so I was feeling new to everything.
As a participant, I'd felt that all my needs were cared for, and I never noticed the behind-the-scenes activity that made the program run so smoothly. Now, I was one of the dozens making it happen.
As an assistant, I had almost as many insights as when I was a participant. When the situation is right, learning can happen, even if the lessons come from watching your own arrogance, stubbornness, and pain.
I share my learning in the hope that it may help you avoid some of my lessons learned the hard way.
1. Be a "yes"When your focus is truly to serve, it doesn't matter what job you're assigned to do. Say "yes" to each job with willingness and enthusiasm, no matter how mundane or distasteful it seems. I watched one man who was assigned the job of cleaning bathrooms every day. He accepted with a smile and positivity I'm afraid I couldn't have mustered. I learned to say "yes" with a smile, even if I wasn't feeling so positive at first. Then I found a way to turn the task into a gift.
For example, my first day, I was in charge of filling water glasses for the 50 volunteers. This assignment seemed mundane and tedious, but I remembered the lesson. I turned the task into a gift. As I filled each glass, I wished this water would help the volunteer focus on helping the participants with their breakthroughs.
The next day one of my duties was to type into the computer some messages written by the participants. At first I felt that this job was too lowly for me-after all, do they know who I am? But my indignation fell away when I learned that I was chosen because I was the most advanced Macintosh user there, and these messages were very important. In fact, as I learned later, it was an honor to read the private messages that were sent to the program's facilitator.
Do you ever have to do jobs that you don't want to do? Scrubbing floors, cleaning garages, filing, writing reports? Of course, we all have to do things we don't want to do. See if there's a way to say "yes" to the task, and do it as if it were a gift.
2. Don't let others' assessments sway you
On my first day I was assigned to a team leader who was to show me my tasks. Earlier, she commented to me about several others on the team. "I know you can handle this task, but Maureen and Wendy can't even fill the water glasses right. They seem to be unable to do even the simplest tasks correctly."
I found myself responding to Maureen and Wendy similarly. I'd already made an assessment that they were incompetent at most everything. I began discounting them. If I needed advice on a job, I ignored them.
The next day I learned that they had assisted many times, even more than my team leader. They were very competent in the running of the program. I was dismayed by how easily I'd allowed myself to be swayed by someone else's assessment. I hadn't given Maureen and Wendy a chance to show me how much they knew.
3. Be willing to be incompetent
The following day I was to write down the participants' names as they shared about their breakthroughs.
At first it was an easy task as one or two would stand at a time, with some time in between, as others prepared themselves to share. Then the pace quickened with four or five in quick succession.
The pace kept up, and I got behind. I missed some of the names. The man I reported to pointed this out, although I already knew it. What I had remembered as a jubilant time as a participant, turned into a nightmare for me as a volunteer. I was near tears.
The next day, after sharing my frustration with a few fellow volunteers, they helped me see that part of my frustration was from feeling incompetent. I was in a foreign situation, asked to do things precisely, and then messed up a seemingly simple task.
I realized that I don't often allow myself to be incompetent-a beginner, if that sounds better to you. Although I try new things, they're built upon actions in which I've been successful.
I vowed to be incompetent-a beginner-more often, to learn and experience things outside my base of competency. Then I won't be so rattled when I'm faced with experiences far from my comfort zone.
Are you willing to be a beginner? Are you willing to not do well at something that seems simple? Are you willing to learn from the experience, not just how to do the job better, but how to be gracious even when messing up something important? I know I have a long way to go to become a master in this area.
© 1996 Morgan Seminar Group
_______________________Rebecca L. Morgan, CSP, is a dynamic speaker and seminarist. She is the author of four books, TurboTime: Maximizing Your Results Through Technology, Calming Upset Customers, Life's Lessons: Insights and Information for a Richer Life, and Professional Selling. For information on her speaking services, books, and tapes contact her at 1440 Newport Ave., San Jose, CA 95125, 408/998-7977, 800/247-9662, fax: 408/998-1742, rebecca@RebeccaMorgan.com, www.RebeccaMorgan.com. Please contact Rebecca for permission to reprint or repost this item.
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